Q&A: What is the Difference between a Dominant, a Master, and an Owner?

Great question, especially since all the terms and dynamics can really start to blend together when you are new and just learning. My answers are going to be generalizations only. A lot of practitioners are going to be using these elements differently or defining things differently for the purposes of their relationship. Most people are not one thing or one set archetype.

First, the term Dominant could be used more generally as a term to encompass all the leadership roles within a BDSM relationship type, essentially referencing the Top. Therefore, the term 'dominant' might be referring to anyone in a D/s, M/s or O/p relationship. But let's look more specifically at each.

When trying to differentiate between the three: D/s, M/s, O/p, it can be important to note that they all call upon a similar mentality of leadership and dominance. There are some nuances in the relationships that the three partake in that separate them. So some of the biggest distinguishing factors are going to be dependent on how they want to execute their dominance.

Generally, the difference between a Master and a Dom is based on a lot of factors. One of the biggest ones is when and now much negotiation is part of the relationship. Slaves typically set their limits upfront with their Master and then the Master can do whatever they want whenever they want within those limits. Let's call this front-loaded-negotiations. The relationship is going to be more focused on serving the Master’s needs and desires. This previous statement won't always be true but typically Masters tend to be more rigid and focused and more demanding of obedience, thus desiring the submissive to be a slave.

A Dominant is going to have continual negotiations with the submissive and the submissive is going to have a bigger focus and contribution to the progression of the relationship. I like to think that the sub has a journey that the dominant leads them on. The Dominant is trying to create growth opportunities for their submissive as part of the dynamic in hopes of training them towards a goal that the submissive hopes to conquer.

An Owner typically wants to participate in play a relationship where the submissive takes on "less than human" characteristics. This could be in the form of a pet or animal, but it can also be a doll/fuckdoll, robot, or inanimate object. Depending on the dynamic this usually looks a lot like either an M/s or D/s relationship. Typically it looks like something between the two as there is a lot of overlap in practice. Caging the dog and tormenting it and making it serve you but then also deeply caring for it, bathing it and feeding it pulls from all aspects of BDSM and doesn't fall as strictly into one dynamic category. It depends on how objectification, and how much of it, is desired.

The best part of BDSM is that there is no box that you have to fit in. Learning is key, and the more you know, the more you can define yourself and what you are looking for. The better you know yourself the safer and more engaging your play will be.

Happy Hunting.